Bounce Back from the Big Fat Negative (BFN)


Develop each move as some moves are in your control.

Some of us know all too well what a Big Fat Negative is…others are wondering what I’m talking about. A BFN is a negative pregnancy test, which cannot be confused with a BFP, a Big Fat Positive test.

Many times when working with clients I like to come up with a “Top 10” list for their challenge. Recently, an infertility client said to me, “Please develop a Top 10 list for recovering from BFNs…I’m crippled each month it happens.”

There’s no doubt about it, struggling with infertility is a rollercoaster ride. The beginning of a cycle is so focused on doctor appointments, medications, blood draws and ultrasounds. Then your IUI or egg retrieval and embryo transfer happens and you have to wait two weeks for “The Answer.” Even if you are trying naturally, all the monitoring gets old very quick.

What I remember about BFNs is that some months I was able to take it in stride and plan for the next cycle. While other months left me anxious and weepy into the next cycle. Not a good thing when wanting to be open and radiate positivity in support of your mind and body to do its best work.

So what can you do to honor your disappointment and sadness, yet pave the way for positivity in the next month? Reference this list, or develop your own, to keep yourself focused and on target: Continue reading